Carting Around a Dragon-poem

Without a doubt these are very heavy creatures

But for those who have no wings

From birth or from a fight with another dragon

Or for those who are just plain lazy

To terrorize the kingdom anymore

Or to eat any of the farmer’s cows or sheep

Somebody must cart these fire starters around.

But how does one do this?

Their butts are too big for a wheelchair

Or a wheelbarrow or a car or SUV.

However, I suppose you could stick it

Onto a really big semi-truck with a flatbed.

But then again if the creature gets angry

With the truck driver for some reason

It could deflate the tires with his sharp talons

And cause an enormous traffic accident.

So it’s only for short distances that this is done.

What about carrying it for long distances?

Like if the Dragon has a family out-of-state

And it feels like visiting them for x-mas?

Well, in that case they are flown over

By the underside of an airplane.

Dragons are no longer allowed to fly on top

Anymore because they like to eat the birds

And they can stir the plane around to catch them.

Nowadays they are flying from cables

Which is kind of embarrassing for a Dragon.

They used to put them in air balloons

Until they started blowing them up in fire

And falling to the ground with a loud thump

It wasn’t until 1980 with the Kansas Incident

That ended up making the state flat

And the FAA decide that flying them by balloons

Was no longer a viable option.

They do not like to be carted around anyways.